Arachnomania

All through the winter I have this feeling like I am just holding out for summer. I hate being cold and I hate getting up in the dark and so I would honestly rather be sweaty and smelly and hot than too cold. Being cold just makes me feel sorry for myself, really!

What I always seem to forget during the winter months is that with summer time comes the inevitable creature feature. I am not the only living thing who is feeling the joys of spring. The mozzies are out, and so are all of the other little creepy crawly itchy making blood suckers, naturally.

But this year I am noticing a most overwhelming surplice of everyone’s favourite creepy crawly, spiders.

I honestly don’t remember that spring and summer are meant to mark the return of the eight legged freaks along with the other six legged ones. But they are everywhere. And by everywhere I mean EVERYWHERE! I have been collecting them from my children’s beds, their shoes, their bags, you name it, I have pulled a spider off it recently.

This morning I stopped at the petrol station to pop into the garage shop and when I came out I found my daughter standing outside the car with wide eyes. Yip. There was a rain spider the size of my hand in the car.  The ensuing chase between the spider (crawling deviously in that freakish eight legged way into the most ridiculous to get at positions) and me (armed with a tube of lip gloss and a small blue plastic cup) was so funny that by the end of it I was actually laughing. Eventually I managed to flick it out of the door with said lip gloss and I received a round of applause from the small crowd of early morning coffee buyers and pump attendants who had gathered to watch. Needless to say like a good mommy I was more horrified by the witnesses to my filthy car than I was about the spider. If my daughter had been willing to drive with it in the car I would have just left it.

So why all the fuss with catching the spiders? I have never been a huge fan of killing spiders. I feel that it is somehow incredibly bad Karma. Either that or it’s all of the alien movies I have seen. I can’t shake the idea that maybe there is a race of giant spiders out in hyperspace somewhere keeping tally on who does  and does not squish.

Ludicrous much? Maybe. Whatever the reason I don’t feel Irey about killing them.

But wow. The last few weeks have been infested with the things!

Tonight I finally reached my limit though. After my beautiful shower I reached for the towel hanging on the hook next to me, happen to glance at it and there lies the mother of all evil herself. A spider that can only have been spawned in direct linage to Shelob herself. This hairy black beast had made nice in my towel as if she were lying in wait, just waiting for me wrap her up to me. The very embodiment of childhood fears  on eight legs.

Well that did it. I did a little naked streak to the kitchen for ammunition left by the previous tenant and I did something I haven’t done in years. I Doomed the living daylights out of that sucker!

Spiders beware! I am stocking up on Doom this season. No more Mrs Nice Guy. The rain spiders can stay, provided you suckers stay the freak out of my towel!

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